Just make the few changes I suggested and your letter will be perfect!
只要改动我提到的个别地方,你的信就会很完美了。
You cannot judge a tree by its bark.
人不可貌相。
the Florentines gave him a state funeral and had a pictured with as dedicated to the memory of 'the most valiant soldier and most notable leader, Signor Giovanni Haukodue.'